~11-28-05~ Hello!

i hope you all had a wonderful and safe holiday!


back to the grind now! bob was off all last week, they are always on shut down thanksgiving week. it was so nice! not only having his company all day, but i got to sleep in almost every day!!!!!!!!!!!! that was terriffic!!!!!!!!!!!!! love him!


didn't get a THING accomplished though. except decorating for christmas a bit, which we didn't plan on doing! but of course it cost money so we did! all our stuff is in storage, so i had to go buy new stuff!

i don't know if i mentioned but we bought this christmas tree off a family member. it is one of those prelit jobbies. can you say PAIN IN MY ASS?!?!?!?! i didn't know it was just a regular tree, with regular lights all wrapped the hell around the branches. which isn't a bad thought. but for some reason mine of course is being difficult and half the strands didn't work. so i had to go through all the bulbs with this tester thing, and half the time i would just move something and they would come on. one strand i just had to cut off cause i don't know what the problem was. after going through every light about 10 times, i just cut it the hell off! then i had a big bare area, so i had to go buy lights. and i couldn't just buy a strand for there cause the tree only had red, orange and pink lights. so i bought a few of multi and threw them on to match. it is ok, but now a few of the other strands are out again, and i am DEFINITELY NOT messing with them. the tree only cost $25, so it is not much of a biggie, but i don't think i will be using this tree again!

so anyways, money was spent this past week!

have i said how much i love walmart?? you won't believe what we got!!



for $316!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! three hundred dollars!!!!!! it was an open box deal, and the bottome ting that covers the speakers, the clip was broke and it wouldn't stay on.

can you believe that!!!!!! i super glued it and it is fine. it didn't have a remote, but who cares! so far one that i have for the dvd thing works!

that is our incredible deal of the week. no xbox, but new tv! for even cheaper! woo-hoo!!



in other news, i have been spotting for the past few days. has me a bit stressed and hopeful at the same time. it could be implantation bleeding, the time is right. the thing that worries me is that the last time i had bleeding, is when i had my ectopic pregnancy. then again, implantation bleeding is normal. so i don't know if i am pregnant or not. i still have a few days til i can test. FINGERS CROSSED!!!!

well i need to go see what my child is in to now!!!!!!

~11-22-05~ Update

this is an update to the previous post.

LOOK!!!!!!!!!!!

~11-22-05~ Some people are just NUTS?!?!

well, NO x-box here!!!


we were at walmart shopping yesterday afternoon around 1pm, and there were ALREADY PEOPLE IN LINE for the xbox!!!! it didn't go on sale until midnight!!!!!!

when we got home we called all the walmarts and most of their lines were already full!!!!

there was no way i was sending bob to sit in line all damn afternoon and night anyways!!!!

but look at THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


now i wish he and i BOTH would have went and sat our asses in line!!! MIND you these sold in the store for $399!!!!!!!!!! and sold for that price!!!! we could have made over $3000!!!!!!!!!!

even the cheaper ones are going for over $1000. i would have taken that too!!!!!


DAMN!

~11-13-05~ Hello!

i will just start by saying that now my child is well, and NOT medicated at night, LORD THAT CHILD DOES NOT WANT TO GO TO SLEEP!!!!!!!!!

i am starting to miss the medicine!!!!!!!!!


well, he is in there now, NOT sleeping, but hopefully he will stay put for the night. i just put a little heater in there, and he is fasinated with it. lets all hope that he stays away from it like we have told him. he knows it is HOT, and he gets that. as a matter of fact it is up by his dresser, and he didn't even want to get up there and get ready for bed, he kept saying "HOT, HOT". but still he has man genes, so you women know how that goes............we will see.


i am glad to say that i am FINISHED christmas shopping!!!! finished mostly today, and it was mostly for clay, and he is mostly, definitely, absoulutely SPOILED!! the only thing i have left to get are a few gift cards, which can be picked up any ole' time. and the damn tv i am trying to get for clay's room....each damn walmart must have only had 2 in stock, cause they were sold out at both of the ones i went to! but really that can wait, cause as soon as we get it there is nowhere big enough to hide that, so he will get it early if we get it early.


my christmas list this year:

MOM: she just wants gift certificates, which i really hate getting, but it is what she wants, so i am getting her $100 at best buy and 2 $50 to the 2 movie theaters she goes to alot.

Grandpa: i got these for him. and i am going to get this off ebay, isn't it adorable!!!!!

Aunt Jane: ordered this today, so pretty!

Aunt Con: i went in with my mom and we got her this and some cd's.

Raeann: i got her this from clay, and personalized it with "cousin raeann"

Dominic: it is hard to shop for a 15 year old boy!! so i just get him a best buy gift certificate.

Samatha: these are cool. i got them for all 3 girls. hope they work ok. and i got her one of those hair twirrling things, that wraps pieces of your hair with ribbon. don't know if i can find a link to it.

Bob's Family-

Mom: she got a couple of cd sets, and this. we also got this for both grandma and grandpa.

Dad: these nice work clothes. he drives tow truck, so he is out in the cold all winter.

Sister: got her this from clay.

Eddie: he just got his first truck, so i thought these were appropriate. i think he will get a kick out of them.

Samatha: this same camera

Steffanie: this same camera

and

Marisa: can't link to it in the OFF chance that molly will look. i like the parent to be just as surprised as the kid. yes, i DON'T like to know what clay is getting either!!

the spoiled one:

this is my double purchase, with some games.

this is the main gift along with the tv.

then a few games 1, 2, 3

bob broke down and LET me get this....i don't know what the big damn deal is!!!!

also, this......and of course a bunch of stocking stuffers!!


and OUR christmas gift we still have to get. i have a secret. i shouldn't tell cause if you live around me and beat us to it i will be very upset!!! but here it goes. the walmart i went to did NOT do pre-orders. so what they get in will be first come first serve. so i was planning on stalking the walmart at midnight, but bob said he wouldn't be comfortable with me out by myself, so he is going to go for it. the only thing i don't like is that on the walmart website they have a bundle package, and that is what we wanted, but the guy at the store said they are only selling the systems in the sale paper. that sucks!! i don't want to stall around and NOT try and get it at the store and HOPE that the online site gets some in before chirstmas. hell, maybe if we end up with 2 we will put one up on ebay.


speaking of which. like i said i finished my shopping today, then when i came home i remembered that i had bid on an auction.......needless to say i won, and it is what i just damn bought!!!! AAAAHHHHHHHHHH.........so that too is either going back to the store, or up on ebay.....or if any of you want to purchase a interactv with a few discs, let me know.


bob is down watching the game........lord how i hate sports!!!!!!!!! it is a good thing that it is a night game, hence we got to finish our shopping, but i want to watch my damn shows!!!!!


which brings me to our damn DVR box is screwing up again! at least this time i didn't lose anything, but it keeps coming on like it is taping, and it won't let you do anything. i hate technology!!!!!!!!!!!!! i still haven't got our dvd recorder to work either! SUCKS!


well, i am off, guess i can go watch some of my shows in the bedroom!

night all!!


P.S. I just finally added my pictures from niagara falls over at my flickr thing on the left.....check em' out!

~11-9-05~ Update

well i think we are finally getting well here!!!!!!!!!!!!!

woo-hoo! it has only been like a month!!!!


i finally got my voice back on sunday. that was awful!!!!! thankfully it was during the weekend, because if i had been stuck with clay by myself all day with no voice, i would have went insane.


so just a few quick things.

is anyone else going as nuts as i am about who is going to die on lost tomorrow?!?!?! i have been waiting for 3 weeks!!!!!!!!!!!! what the hell. the only one i would want it to be is shannon, i can't stand her!! i'm still pissed that boone died and not her!! if not her, then as long as it is someone i don't know. like that is really going to happen. guess we will find out tomorrow.

also.......is bob and i the only one's who like the weaver family on the amazing race? did we miss something?!?! i don't understand why everyone hates them????? on the show and on a few blogs that i have read. i like them!


i think that is about it. my throat is getting a bit sore now, which is upsetting me, i don't want to go backwards!!!! so i am off to bed, early for a change!! well, early for me!

take care!

~11-4-05~ FRUSTRATED!!

ok, i can still BARELY talk and it is driving me nuts!!!!!!!!!!!!!

especially trying to talk on the phone! noone can understand me!! or i have to keep repeating myself which pisses me off too!

AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! at least i can yell here!! :)

~11-4-05~ I'm speechless!

LITTERALLY!!!!!!


for some reason i am losing my voice! i don't have a real sore throat or anything. when i cough it hurts, but that is cause it is mostly dry coughs. but i really don't feel bad at all! what the hell?!?!?! and even like i said when i cough, it doesn't hurt in my lungs, just my damn throat! weird!! hopefully i will still have a voice in the morning.


clay seems a bit better. last night he slept mostly all the way through. he cried out around 3am, and i was up to go into his room and then i heard nothing else. he did however, come in my room around 5am. i fought with him, but i took him right back to his bed, and thankfully he fell back to sleep and i don't think he was up til about 8am.

so hopefully he is on the mend. i much rather be sick that see him sick. i just hope whatever i have i don't give back to him!!!!!!!!!!!

AGAIN, why the hell aren't any of these other kids sick?!?!?! they are the ones who are probably bringing this shit into my house!!!!!!!!!!! hell we don't go anywhere! so it has to be them bringing it to us, but i never see them sick and miserable!!!!!


no news for the crazy neighbors. ashley did call today, i felt bad and answered. WE ALREADY KNOW I AM CRAZY! i still feel bad for her. the REASON i feel bad, if you remember, she is slow. she isn't all there. and i believe she was doing well for herself until she fell under the influence of her "foster mom". and i don't think her "foster mom" truly cares for ashley (or her other kids or herself for that matter), so really ashley has NO one! can you even imagine a life like that?!?! at 21, probably even functioning at a lower level. to have NOONE!!!!!!!!

i mean the poor girl is in jail and calls me. and not even to really say anything!! she had noone else to call! i know i am a big ole sap! i'm sorry, i just feel too much sometimes!!!


in other depressing news, i think i am starting my period!!!!!!!!!! which sucks! especially since i wasted 2 damn pregnancy tests!!!! to even stick it to me more, i took the damn test this morning, and i am gonna damn spot this evening!!! thanks for shattering the hopes i had!!

there is still that like 1% of me that is just hoping the spotting is from implantation. with my ectopic, i started to spot when i was supposed to have my regular period, so i just thought i was having a VERY LIGHT one for a change. that is normal sometimes, NOT IN MY CASE THEN!! but we should DEFINITELY know in a few days.

if not back to the sex! UGH! not to make it sound awful, but my cycles are off a few days all the time, so in determining when i am ovulating, there are several days it could be, so to be safe it would be best to have sex for like a week straight! that is a damn lot of sex!!!!!!!!!!!! i am not in my 20's anymore!!!! i know bob will be loving it, what guy wouldn't! but it sort of takes the fun out of it ya know.


i could always get those ovulation predictor kits, but my whole thing is, that i still won't know what the hell side i am ovulating from!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT is what i need to know!! if it is the left, i'm screwed! (double!) then it was all basically for nothing. then we have to do the whole wait it out again. this sucks! i really, REALLY feel for couples who have been trying for a mightly long time. that has to be so terribly frustrating and disappointing. i don't know if i would have that in me. well, if not this time, hopefully next time, for everyone who is trying!


i have to pay bills and that sucks! looking at that nice paycheck and knowing it is almost all going to be gone in about a half hour sucks!!!!!!!!!


well that is about all for me..........good night!


P.S. everyone wish tricia GOOD LUCK on her new job she starts tomorrow! go get 'em girl!!!!

~11-3-05~ The saga continues!!

i will save all the drama for the end of the post, before i get to all of that, some news that actually relates to ME!

i thought clay was getting better. he actually didn't cough at all last night til almost 3am. he did get up and come in my room, but i gave him a cough drop, put him back in bed and that was it! he wasn't up til 7:30am!!!

so about 3:30 this afternoon, i happen to feel him and he feels like he is on FIRE!!!! i ran and got the thermometer and he had a fever of 103.6!! so i called the doctor and of course they suggested he come in. well after carting him and kids to the doctor, and sitting in the damn exam room for ALMOST AN HOUR!! she comes in, checks him out, and says she thinks he has a sinus infection. so i got even MORE medicine now!

hopefully THIS will work!!!!!!!!!!!! me?? i still don't know what my deal is. hopefully i will get better soon as well, or i may have to break down and go to the doctor's my own self.

i did break down and take that test on monday. NEGATIVE! i knew i should have waited!!!! i think i am going to take the other one in the morning. FINGERS CROSSED!



well to the drama........i don't even know if i have the time or energy to post it all right now........so you remember what i was saying the other day............(how do i link back to a previous post?) *i think i got it....

anyways....they got back in town on tuesday. well when i got back from the doctors tonight the "foster" daughter, ashley called and wanted me to look something up on the computer and about her phone being lost....i just told her i would call her back we were in the middle of searching for our ATM card (yes, again for the 500millionth time) so it wasn't found so i sent bob out with a credit card to get some food. so i called ashley to do whatever and this lady answered the phone. i asked to speak with ashley and she said ashley was there but she wasn't letting her speak on the phone.

i was like "um, ok??"

the she proceeded to tell me she was donna's ("foster" mom) mom and her and ashely got into it today. then she tells me that ashley jacked her or something i don't know. all i got was, "i'm a 52 year old woman! the only way she got it on me is cause i didn't have no shoes on and i was sliding on the wet leaves in the driveway...."

i was like "oh, wow? um, where is donna" i get, "she here" me: "oh, ok?"

then she goes on, "i should really call the cops on her. but they be havin the cops over her all the time and people here have warrants."

me, "oh, yeah?"

she continues, "there was one time some guy spoke bad about me, and donna whipped his ass, this girl ashley beat me down and donna's not doing nothing! i'm her own mamma! ashley is nothing but donna's fuck girl. anything donna wants ashley will do...........on and on and on and on.........

then i told her who i was and she thanked us for the cigarettes that she has been bumming off of us all week, we finally just gave her a pack sunday. i finally got off the phone.


so we are eating dinner, then ashely shows up. so we ask her what the heck is going on. she said the grandma hit her first and then she just started whomping on her.

oh mind you this all happened cause ashley wanted to come over to use the computer, but the grandma didn't want ashley to take the kids yet cause they didn't eat.....*people i don't understand how something like that turned to blows really, but then again, look who i am dealing with.

so i asked ashley who in the house had warrants, that the grandma spoke of. ashley said the grandma. for parole violation, i asked for what and she said she didn't know. anyways, we also got out of her that that dude was back living over there!!!!

so she was up on the computer and the little boy came and got her, they tore out like a bat out of hell. a bit later, donna, the mom, calls me to tell me that the cops came and arrested ashley. i was like, "really? oh wow?" like why are you telling me this? she said she talk to me tomorrow. i NEVER talk to this woman!

so anyways, it is now 8:30 and we go upstairs to get clay ready for bed, and the doorbell rings. i'm on the toilet being nosey, here it is the grandma! so she is telling bob what happened.

here i guess it started like i said, ashely wanted to come over here and the grandma said no let the kids eat first. then ashley got mad and yelled at her to stop telling her what to do and "thre" the stroller at the grandma. the grandma got up and grabbed her or something then i guess ashely just started punching on her. i really wish you could hear the woman telling the story, cause it was too funny, but not! i can't even do it justice by typing it all.

so move on to other subjects. she says she is concerned about her grandkids, cause she doesn't like to see them living the way they are. she said she did call KIDS or something, but they would take the kids, but not grandma too, and grandma doesn't have anywhere to go (note on that: apparently her man or something had cancer so she quit her job to care for him and he just died recently. they had to sell their house and all their belongings for his care, so now she is homeless, jobless and penniless *truth, who knows) she was going on about how awful her daugher is, and she can't believe that she gave birth to her. that she is a liar and a manipulator.

so we then asked her if ashley is donna's foster daughter. NOPE!

then we asked if the other kids were foster's (like donna told us). NOPE!

i really can't even type everything here, but grandma seemed to be making really good sense to me about the enviroment over there! even if she is full of shit in general, i was saying halleluiah to 99% of it.

she then had to call several people and tell them the whole story, cause i guess donna was calling everyone and telling them lies? so i got to hear the story about 3 more times.

she was also saying that donna is scizophrenic. and also that she is NOT pregnant, and that she can't get pregnant!!! and that dude DOES think that donna really is! also, i don't know if i mentioned about the "husband" that lives there and this dude too. well here the husband didn't know that dude was her boyfriend, he thought he was a COUSIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON OVER THERE?!?!?!?!?!?

then she called ashley's REAL grandmother. told her the story. and here ashley wasn't even really arrested because of beating up the grandma, but on some warrant that she had about some credit card fraud or something!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she then proceeded to tell the grandma that ashley was sleeping with WOMEN!! i know my mouth hit the floor on that one! not the act, but i can't believe she told her grandma!!!!

also supposedly they are moving in 2 weeks to some low income housing or something. bob later called the landlord (bob's friend) and he said he already put an eviction notice in the mail cause they haven't paid rent. everyone who lives there gets some sort of SSI and welfare, and disability. the grandma said that donna gets like 5 disability checks. she confused me on why, something about some blood disorder? i don't know! but she said they are all about $500 a piece!!

so if you read here, you read how i feel awful for these kids cause i don't think they get to eat. so the grandma was saying about how they haven't had meat in like 2 or 3 days, they have been eating the ramen noodles and beans and franks.....she said she had to go in donna's room to get something and there on the floor were bags and bags of take out food that donna and that dude have been eating but NOT the rest of the family, including the KIDS!!!!!!

anyways she said that ashley's grandma said she was NOT going to get her out, but to keep her in there to get her away from donna!

i thought that ashley was living there to basically take care of the kids. which is partly right. but i also found out that ashley is PAYING $300 to live there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that tripped my shit out cause poor ashley has NO life! she can't go out, she is always taking care of the kids. she gets up with them, gets them off to school, and gets them when they come home from school. she is ALWAYS with those kids. i thought that was like her job, and in return she got a place to stay! now to find out she is paying!!!!! fuck that!!


it is just a big ole mess over there!!!!!!!!!! the lady didn't leave til after 10pm!! and i also gave her another pack of cigarettes! hell i don't know what i am going to write about after these people leave! haha!

there is a ton of stuff i didn't even put in here. it is all just craziness!!

i just feel soooooooooooooooo bad for the kids! they really, really are GOOD kids! SOMEHOW!! i asked bob tonight if there was a way we could adopt all of them. yes, i am crazy! i was only HALF kidding!!!!!!!! they don't deserve what they are being given. they should have so much more. they are cute and funny, and just so full of hope and potential. to see that being taken away right in front of my eyes is so depressing!! i feel so helpless!!

i thought about writing a letter to child services, apparently the call we made did no service! but then you hear those horror stories about those poor kids put into the system! especially since i am 100% sure they would all be broken up and not kept together, there are 5. i think they rely and depend on each other. it is just such a tough call. i mean if i knew they were getting beat or starved, but then again the mental things these poor kids are dealing with may be just as bad.

then when they do move, it is going to drive me nuts NOT knowing how they are doing. at least here i can sort of keep an eye on things. maybe i will just have to do the letter, at least for my peace of mind.

well, i really have to go.....again it is super late! but i hear no coughs so far tonight, hopefully that is a good sign!

take care everyone!!!!

~11-1-05~ quick

go HERE

enter for the email address to log in: the_ewells@yahoo.com, then password blogger. you can check out all the houses that i have in my SAVE file.

~11-1-05~ Today????

well i am debating on taking a pregnancy test tomorrow. i just don't want to take it early and waste the damn thing!! but i want to know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


i got the early tests that say you can test as early as 4 days BEFORE your period. i usually start about the 5th. so technically i could test the 1st. the test results are:

dected teh hormone levels in 69% of women 4 days before; 83% 3 days before; and 93% 2 and 1 days before.

so i don't know! i may just wait til the 2nd to do it.


aside from my cough, i was wondering if my general crapiness feeling could be because i am pregnant. i didn't have any of that the first time, but then again i slept all day!!! and didn't have a 3 year old to chase after. and my boobs have started hurting. that was a DEFINITE with my first pregnancy and AT THE GET GO!!!! that was wonderful to deal with for 9 months, actually longer, casue it was worse while breast feeding!!!!!!!

then again, this could all be in my mind! you know how the brain can work!!


why does my child NOT start coughing until this time when i come upstairs?!?!?! and it is no fail he will be up shortly!

last night he was up around 1am, i finally got him to let me spray some nose stuff in his nose, but then he wanted to see daddy......so i let him go lay with bob. i finally went in there about 2am. i laid down then tossed around wondering if i should put him back in his own bed. finally about 2:30am i decided to try and take him in there.

i picked him up, he stayed asleep, carried him in there, laid him down, was happy.....as soon as i was about to leave the door.....MOMMMMMMMYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!! i think i finally made it back to be after 3am sometime. and of course around 6am he was in there again!!

i really don't want to cave cause he is sick, but then again.....HE IS SICK! HE WANTS HIM MOMMY AND DADDY!!!!!

and whenever he some out crying "MY SICK" it breaks my heart!!!! so i don't even think i am going to fight tonight. lets face it, i am going to get NO sleep either way, so i may as well do it without the fight and just let him sleep in the bed! i seriously don't see ANY sign of us getting better!!!!!!!! i think we really may have to head to the doctors!! BOTH of us!!

the last time i was sick, sick i was a few months pregnant with clay. i had bronchitis, which turned into pneumonia. that sucked! i used to get bronchitis ALL the time, like several times a year when i was younger. thankfully that stopped! and again i haven't had it for over 3 years! i guess i have felt it coming on for the past few months, just the wheezes, but now i have the damn cough! but it hasn't got bad like it usually does. even the wheezing. i haven't had to use my inhaler at all.

i really think a lot of it is because i am so damn lazy. i don't MOVE! i really need some type of cardio to build my heart and lungs up. you get tired and winded being pregnant, me already being that will will be even worse!!

i think he is up...........

well that wasn't too bad, but it was a fluke, he will be up again shortly.

another thing i will NEVER have in my house again, SQUEAKY FLOORS!!!!! which sucks, cause i like older houses, but damn!!


speaking of houses, i found a few more that are ok. one that i really like kind of sucks cause it is a modular home. i know there is nothing wrong with modular homes....i just don't like the looks from the outside!! and why don't people ever build garages with theirs?!?!

anyways HERE it is.....check out the other pictures, it is REALLY nice inside!!

it is almost all that i want! LAND, yes, almost 2 acres! clost to mom, YES, about 16 minutes, finished basement, YES, and there are even some bonuses, like the pond (LOVE), the pool, and the PRICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i really would like 3 floors, but hell you can add on can't you?! i mean for that price, in time...........

i don't know...........

well, i better be off now. who knows when he is going to be back up. i'll let you all know what i do about the test!!